I know that this year will be interesting
Nowadays If I don't work, I spend most of my time reading books, writing blogs, listening to podcasts and getting ready for my exam (decided to do my second master in social psychology, that's why I read books I have blogs about)
I am also trying to take care of my mental health by going to therapy (also yoga where I am tortured and my best friend is happy to watch it 3 days a week).
But the biggest challenge is to have healthy coping mechanisms with everything going around, to grieve what I had to grieve, to feel what I need to feel. I don't try to go and find escape in other people or in obsessive activities ( I used to do it so often), I am asking for help when I need it ( I didn't know that it was an option) and I am trying to be in the present even if it's not a sunny place to be.
It's hard not to think about the "what if" scenarios, so I have to remind myself that it is what it is and I have to do my best in this scenario
To be honest, I am proud of myself cause now mentally I am in a position where I wanted to be one year ago when I started therapy: I can let myself feel (happiness, joy, pain, anger, disappointment, love..), I can see how important it is to love myself ( I will start falling in love with myself soon, I promise), I can understand others feelings and decisions even though it's not what I would do or even though it hurts me, I know that we should let go people from our life and let them be happy, I try not to minimize myself or others only because it's easier to deal with things, I try to be in present.
But I would never be here without my friends or therapy, so thanks to everyone who is with me not only during bad days, but in good days too.
I started this journey more than one year ago, it's much better and much more successful than my first one ( journey description: trying to go under the rainbow at the age 7, purpose: to become a boy, result: unsuccessful) and I will continue this journey cause it gives me opportunity to be me (after 25 years my purpose fortunately changed, now I am aware that even though I am a woman I can ride horses, I told you this journey is much better)
Why am I writing it? Well, to tell you that one of my love languages is also trying my best to be human being for other humans around me. Why? Well, it's simple- they deserve it
I wish you to find people for whom you want to be the best version of yourself
コメント